A Little Perspective

Our health insurance system is cracked, and the prices set for services and medicine is ridiculous. If you don't have insurance, you are screwed. If you do have insurance, you often feel like you need to hire a lawyer to help you navigate the loophole minefield.

Dealing with insurance companies, doctors, dentists and billing departments blows. Everyone thinks everyone else is trying to screw them over, and really, all anyone wants to do is get through the day and go home.

While a lot of our health issues are related to our lifestyle choices, there are still things you can't plan for, or avoid, or granola your way out of. Know your family medical history. Supplement your Big Macs and milkshakes with produce and water. Choose your doctors wisely.

If you have the opportunity to sign up for health care coverage, do it. If disability insurance is an option, take it. Up front, each month, you will feel a little strain on your bank account. But imagine what this would do to you, your finances, stress levels, and psychological well-being:




And don't think you wouldn't take a deep breath and a smile of relief at this:



Oh, and as for the surgery itself? Doing well! 10 more days and I can join a revival and shake my hands above my head with the best of 'em. And after seeing this insurance claim, I totally want to.

Quick, name the artist of this 8 year old music reference!

Someone flipped a switch and it's suddenly fall in Florida. Which means it's a high of 90 and a low of 55. A 35 degree difference between 6 am and 1 pm just ain't right, but we take what we can get.

Yesterday started off pleasant. Our thermostat is set at 75, and for the past 6 months the air conditioner has been running pretty much constant. So I didn't think much about the humming from the vents. It's background noise, which I enjoy. And since it is Florida, I didn't pay much attention to the warmth in the room. It was a sunny day, the blinds were open, my mouse-ing hand was getting a tan, all normal.

When Mike walked in the door at 7pm he went straight to the thermostat and asked, "Why is it 81 degrees in here?"

I assumed it was because he had jacked the setting up to 90 degrees when he left that morning. He likes to piss me off like that sometimes. I hadn't really noticed that anything was amiss. But, now that he mentioned it, it was hot in herre.

He demonstrated that he had in fact turned it down to 70 degrees while he was getting ready this morning. Apparently this is something we're doing now? Before I could get riled up about the electric bill, we put our hands up to the vent. It was like someone's asthmatic Grandpa was trying to blow out his birthday candles.

Then we peeked outside at the unit itself. Living in an apartment building, we don't pay a lot of attention to things, because we know we aren't responsible for them. However, when the squirrels start chewing on the AC hoses and frost an inch thick builds up on the gaskets, it might be time to care.

Took the picture this morning. The frost melted last night, once we turned the unit off.

And now I'm sitting here, waiting for some maintenance guys to show up and invariably do the same thing they did last time: patch things with duct tape, add some more juice, vacuum out the debris and leave dirty hand prints on my wall. Because we live in an apartment complex with 900 units.



And freon-huffing squirrels.

The Real Housewives of Central Florida

Pronounce this word: Coupon

Did you say it out loud? Heh, hope you were alone...

How did you say it? Koo-pawn? Queue-pawn? Koo-pin?
Yeah, that last one is Ron White's fault.

And on another tangent, that second "ue" in queue is totally unnecessary.

I've always pronounced it queue-pawn, and Mike is quick to correct me. It's just one of those words that I grew up hearing pronounced a little differently. It's not wrong, it's just unusual. As opposed to torlet. That is definitely the backwoods Florida way of saying toilet. At least I don't say lieberry or aks.

My reprogramming is moving along swiftly, due to the inordinate amount of times the word coupon is said in our house. I've kinda developed an obsession with couponing in the past few months in my efforts to save money. Of course, it is a double-edged sword. There is the propensity to buy something simply because you can get a good deal, not because it is a product you use. But, it's also a way to try new products at a lower cost.

I like waiting for BOGO sales and then layering coupons on top of that, getting 2 for less than the price of one. But you have to be patient and not use your coupons immediately. Thursdays are when the new grocery ads come out, and I admit to pulling the ad up online and matching coupons to sales.

It's a sad, little life I've got going on these days, isn't it?
What say we all put on our finery and hit the local hot spot? Of course, the plane tickets to your neck of the woods would severely cut into my recent savings...

If you have a CVS near you, get their little club card, peruse their ads and start stacking coupons. They also offer Extra Bucks, rewards for purchasing certain products at their stores. These store-generated coupons are for money off your next purchases. If your next purchase is 10 minutes later at another register, well, you've got them on a technicality.



Walgreens offers their own Register Rewards, but they are crazy strict on usage. Both places require you to pay the sales tax, which is fine. But at Walgreens, don't try to purchase an item for $5 and use a $6 Register Reward. They won't let you simply pay the tax and waste the rest of the reward, like CVS. Walgreens will deny you the use of the coupon. There can still be good deals there, but follow the rules.


Some of my best expeditions:

CVS: Spent $10.38, Saved $21.93
Total Steals:

Purex 3-in-1 detergent sheets: regular $7.99, on sale for $5.99, minus $3.00 coupon = $2.99, or 63% off. Haven't tried them yet. I've got a 150-ounce jug of Gain I'm still working through. Why yes, it was on sale!

Zegerid OTC 14ct: regular $12.79, on sale for $9.99, minus $3.00 coupon = $6.99, or 46% off.

Plus I had a $5.00 CVS Extra Bucks coupon to use on the total purchase, and received $11.50 in Extra Bucks for next time. Ignoring the sales tax, they actually paid me a penny to leave the store with the Zegerid ($6.99 - $7.00 Extra Buck for next time.) Which I gave to my sister, because I'm nice like that. The Zegerid, not the penny.


Publix: Spent $86.31, Saved $40.66
Total Steals:

Starbucks Ice Cream: BOGO, plus $1.50 coupon = 2 pints for $2.29. Not a product we would normally purchase. Mike said it was ok, but very chocolatey. Since it was Hot Chocolate and Mocha Frap flavors, that's probably what they were going for.

World's Best Cat Litter: Regular $7.99, in-store savings at $5.99, plus $3.00 coupon = $2.99. And as we know, worth it even when it's not on sale.


Walgreens: Spent $13.01, Saved $13.87
Total Steals:

Ponds Towelettes: Regular $5.99, on sale for $3.99, minus $1.25 coupon = $2.74, or 55% off. I got both the morning refresh and the evening soothe selections. They seem to work well, although the chamomile/white tea scent is a bit over-powering in the evening soothe.

Johnson & Johnson cotton swabs: Regularly $2.99, on sale for $1.99. Plus, it was a 375 count box, with a bonus 125, so that's 500 for $1.99. Got 2 boxes. We go through a lot of Q-tips around here.

And I purchased EOS Summer Fruits lip balm. Cost $3.00 and received a $3.00 Register Reward. So, free. Yay! I do love me some lip balm. I may have an addiction. Anybody know a hotline?



There are a ton of blogs and sites devoted to this. I doubt I will reach the levels of these folks. Most likely, I'll slack off. Especially once I get back to work. Which, dear God, please be soon.

Couponing. It's a lifestyle. It takes forever. It may or may not save you money, depending on your usage. It also makes for one boring ass blog post. I'll try for something a bit more titillating tomorrow. The thrill of organizing my sock drawer? Low-sodium tips and tricks? The best way to fold a towel? Oh the possibilities! I'm tingly just thinking about it.

My Train of Thought Is Not an Express

So, last night's episode of Glee.

It was pretty awesome. I'm not going to recap it, because others do that much better than I probably could. Although, there are some shows no one is recapping, and I find that a shame.

I love recaps. I read them for all the shows I watch. Well, I read recaps if Entertainment Weekly or Television Without Pity write them. Is that weird? Hmm... I also only listen to audio books for titles I've already read. I like to wring as much enjoyment/understanding out of entertainment as I can. Or something.

Anyway, Grilled Cheesus. It was emotionally powerful, and the music choices were excellent.

I could relate to a surprising number of issues brought up in this episode, however, one thing that resonated with me was a tiny blip, a throwaway comment from Brittany that will be collected in the blond's lexicon.

"Whenever I pray, I fall asleep."

Oh. Oh my. I have something in common with Brittany S. Pierce.

Well, at least now I know I'm not the only one. You guys, whenever I pray, I tend to drift off. Probably because I go on the longest tangents God has ever had to walk along with someone on. I start with the basics, variations on childhood prayers, then branch out into the specifics of the day. And then I wander off into expositions on the latest episode of Castle, my concerns about Global Warming, and whether or not I calculated the calories right in those chocolate chip cookies.

I've mentioned this to my family, who assures me it's the thought that counts. But... ok honestly? And why not, since if he is omniscient and stuff he already knows this... sometimes I pray because I need some spiritual Nytol. Yes, I may on occasion engage in conversations with God in the hopes that I may lull myself to sleep. Some may say I nod off because I get a sense of peace from praying. I hope this is true, otherwise, I fall asleep due to my inability to form complex and engaging thoughts. (read: I'm boring)

Of course, since you read this blog, you may already know this to be true. I do enjoy taking the long road to get to the point....


::Tiny Spoiler Alert::


Which is: Why was Kurt still going to school while his Dad was in the hospital? Who was taking care of him? Isn't he technically still a minor? Ok, not the point of the story, but still questions that beg answers. And why was Finn's Mom in less than 30 seconds of this whole episode? If she and Kurt's Dad are in a serious relationship, shouldn't she have been hanging around the hospital a bit more?

I think it may have been child-abuse when she made me watch Dumbo

Let's say your workplace is heading into its busy season, and someone in a bigger cubicle than yours has determined your department needs a theme to motivate you through the challenging times and long hours ahead.

Let's say that someone chose THE CIRCUS as the motivational theme.

Would you:
A) Punch him in the throat
B) Purchase elephant dung on the internet, to give his cubicle the unmistakable scent of authenticity
C) Ask your slightly depraved, yet enviably flexible co-worker if you could borrow her trapeze and hang it above the coffee machine, lending Japanese game show flair to the mornings
D) Offer to be in charge of all three rings

If you are my mother, you chose D.

And then you conned your daughters into doing research for you.

So, if you'll excuse me, I need to start pricing rubber noses and unicycles.

However, your input is totally welcome! Circus-themed jokes, game ideas, whatever you've got. My inner kindergarten teacher is on strike right now and all I can think of is that horrible Disney movie and this:

Regardless, they are ALL overpaid.

My family was never well-off. We had good years and bad years. Stretches where my mom didn't have to work, and times when 2 incomes were not enough. We always had food on the table, and dessert, and I never had to walk to school barefoot, in the snow, uphill, both ways. We lived in Florida, after all.

One of my favorite stories from my parents early years of marriage involved the time they were so poor they had a black and white television and no cable. Ironic, since my mother was a bookkeeper for a small cable television company. One Sunday, without any extra money to go to the movies or out to eat, they found themselves watching football. Neither of them particularly enjoyed football, or followed the sport, but there was little else available. They each decided to pick a team, and the one whose team lost would have to do the dishes after dinner. And lo, a tradition was born. And a passion for football.

As the season went on, my parents got more invested. Upping the ante to cooking and cleaning the dishes. Laundry for a week. It became a whole thing. For years, they watched the pre-game shows, checked the stats and read the sports page. Sometimes we went over to one of my paternal uncle's houses and a whole to-do was made. I remember there was a pool and someone grilled.

I never really sat and watched a game with them. I tried, but usually found myself back in my room reading, or talking on the phone. When I got older, I discovered that knowing a few facts about the game and major players gave me a little "in" with the boys in school. All I needed to know was just enough to interject an interesting tidbit into their conversation and I'd have their attention. I never knew what to do with their attention once I got it, but I was halfway there! I'd ask my mom for some info on a specific player, what the best play of the game had been, bad calls, injuries, and I'd be set for Monday morning before the bell.



Even after my parents separated, and we stopped hanging out with my dad's side of the family as much, my mom stayed a fan. And apparently her whole side of the family. Since I left the nest, my family has become the group of people at the sport's bar who get there first and are among the last to leave. They've attended weddings and funerals with the owners. Exchanged Christmas presents. They have a tab for crying out loud. I didn't know you could do that outside of television!

A few years ago they started a football pool. In keeping with the cheap entertainment theme, everyone chips in $2 for the whole season. And then they pick teams each week, the points are tallied and at the end of the season, someone gets a nice gift card to the restaurant of their choice. Good times! One of my sisters is in charge of the whole thing, and does an awesome job of keeping track of everyone's picks, sending out email updates and summarizing the week in football.

In trying to become more connected with my family, I joined the pool this year. We used to be a super tight-knit group, with tons of get-togethers and outings. But as people grow up and the family expands, it gets harder. I left pretty early, and even now live 100 miles away, so it's hard. But I'm making the effort with football. Problem is, I don't know anything about football. I remember some stuff from my youth. Montana to Rice. Marino was #13. Something about The Refrigerator? And Tampa didn't give Testaverde a chance. Any current football knowledge I have comes from Dancing With The Stars. Smith, Sapp, Rice, J. Taylor, Ochocinco, Irvin, L. Taylor, Warner. Most of those guys are retired tho, aren't they? Damn.



Being the competitive person I am, I couldn't just Christmas-tree my picks. So I started researching. I spent probably 3 hours the first week looking at team stats, player stats, who retired, who was traded, etc. Subsequently, I've averaged about 2 hours a week, researching the teams, checking on injuries, matching up the defense and the offense.

Week One: 11 out of 16. Nice job by the Rookie in the pool!
Week Two: 10 out of 16. Excellent, considering I was high on Percocet.
Week Three: 7 out of 16. WTF happened there? Dude... There were some hard decisions to be made last week.

The thing is, I like to wait until Saturday to make my final decision, in case some yahoo sprains an ankle in practice. However, Mike would appreciate it if I spent those 2 hours hanging out with him on Saturday. Fair enough. At least I don't actually watch any games on Sunday. I just check the scores with my phone when he's not looking.

So.... anyone watch football? Have any insider tips for me? I've got about an hour and a half before Mike gets home. Quick!